the social media detox, turned retox

I decided to take a month-long break from Instagram & I’ll be honest—it was major struggle bus vibes.

But why?

I like to think of myself as someone who’s pretty present when I’m with friends and family, but holy cow, stepping away from the app was so tough. The constant craving to check what was going on, the pestering fear of missing out (fomo), and even the muscle memory of fingers to glass screen to open the Instagram app each morning, even though it was deleted, was a TRUE eye-opener.

I felt like an addict.

I was not okay.

After the initial two-week hurdle, things started to get easier. Without spending hours on Instagram—yes, HOURS, even with a self-imposed time limit—I found myself reading more, spending quality time with my loved ones, and even making phone calls. Like…actual phone calls…with MY VOICE, not just a keyboard.

Wild, right?

I also had more time for watching TV, movies, and cooking at home. Weirdly enough, I started cooking more. Probably because I had the mental space to prepare a meal without the distraction of scrolling through a hell-scape of posts.

beach ready, thriving, smiling, day 22 of detox

During a recent week in Florida, I really enjoyed quality time with my partner and his family—playing board games, going to the beach, swimming, and shopping. I was on cloud nine.

Then the month was up.

Logging back into Instagram felt overwhelming. Notifications bombarded me: 55 likes, 49 messages, and 13 new follows. It was like being hit with a digital tidal wave of conversations that had been happening without me.

Photo by Solen Feyissa on Unsplash

I started catching up on messages—mostly memes and cute videos from friends or family. What started at 1:00 PM turned into a full-on catch-up session that lasted until 3:30 PM.

That’s when I realized: I had relapsed.

Or in this case, retoxed.

The rush of being back on Instagram was immediate, but as soon as I put the phone down, I felt drained—dry eyes, a heavy heart, and a mind that could only be described as depleted.

I am a millennial, feeling this way. I don’t even want to start on what social media is doing to younger generations, who have never known a world without the Internet, Instagram, or TikTok. I will however leave that deeper conversation to the expert, Jonathan Haidt—author of The Anxious Generation and the Substack, After Babel.

Short summary: social media bad, real-life interaction good

Now, I am torn. Navigating social media is a freaking maze and I feel a strong urge to go cold turkey and cut Instagram out of my life completely. That month without it was the happiest I’ve been in a while. But there are benefits too—keeping up with friends and family, sharing funny or meaningful moments. Can’t I do that off app, though?

Would my life be better off without it?

I feel like my intuition is guiding me down one path, and even re-reading a post I wrote in July of this year helps paint a bigger picture of where I am at on this topic.

Navigating Social Media's Mindless Maze

As I contemplate this big decision, I want to hear from you. Should I break free from the cold, hard grip of Meta and Zuck? Or should I try and redefine my relationship with their apps, is that even possible? Any experience with either of these pathways?

All advice is welcome.